The One with Some Closure

Well, this is it. Goodbye time.

I am pretty emotional right now, and not necessarily sad emotional, just emotional, more like a mixed feelings type of emotional. A type of emotional that that I have never felt before so I have no frame of reference.

I thought maybe I could write about my departure and share my feelings about my last moments in my community and my goodbyes…. But now all I find in a blinking cursor, and I am struggling to find the right words that express the way I am feeling… all I can come up with is “emotional.” Which is kind of ironic, because if you refer to my very First Blog Post, "emotional" was the only thing I could muster then as well. I feel like I owe my dedicated blog readers more than that….But that is all I have got, for now at least.

I hope to continue with my blog once I get back to the states, I am sure I will have some stories to share about my readjustment.

But before I head back to the “real world” I am going to go explore more of the real “real world.” By the time you read this I will already be out of Panama and in route to my first destination. I may not be writing blog posts during my travels, but I will try to keep up with the videos, so stay tuned.

Thank you for your dedication to my blog and thank you for supporting me through my 2 years in Buena Esperanza. I can’t tell you how comforting it was to know that I had such supportive friends, family, and complete strangers cheering me on. I am so glad that I was able to take you through my experience (virtually).

As promised here is a video of some of my last days in my community, it may seem a bit sad and dramatic, but I feel like making the video was good closure for me. Enjoy.




So it goes...
Meti

The one with the video from September

Video and Pictures from my despedida (going away party) are not included in this video. Stand by

The One with the Snakebite

To me, a large part of what makes life interesting is the non predictability of it. The idea that you really just never know. A common phrase I often hear when something out of the ordinary happens is “well that’s a first.” I think, there is and always will be a chance of having a “first.” I know I have had plenty firsts here in Buena Esperanza, so really, I should have known that the firsts would continue all the way up until the end of my Peace Corps Service.

I have been here for 2 years, I have hiked many trails and I have seen many snakes but it wasn’t until the other day that I witnessed my first snakebite.

The snake’s victim, a young 14 year old girl, was ironically the same girl that was “possessed” a few months ago (read: the one about my muchcha).

Here is what went down:

Last week, I hiked over to my ex-pat/gringo neighbor’s house to say goodbye. As I was leaving, one of their workers stopped me and asked if I could translate for him real quick. These ex-pats don’t speak Spanish, so sometimes things are lost in translation. Federico (the worker) seemed calm, without any sign of urgency or concern, like normal. We patiently waited for the 2 ex-pats to gather and hear what he had to say. I figured Federico wanted to ask them about a raise, or signing a new contact, so there was really no hurry. Once we all got together and were staring at Federico, he turns to me and says “ A snake just bit my daughter so I have to go.” I was completely shocked by the unanticipated that I forgot my role of translating and started firing questions. “Which daughter, where is she? When did it happen? What did the snake look like?”

He needed me to tell the ex-pats that he was leaving work to go search for his dad, the medicine man, who was out working in the farm (jungle).
Once questions were answered and the situation was explained and translated, Federico slowly walked away, until he thought he was out of site, at which point he took off in a full on sprint.

I said my goodbyes to the neighbors again, and headed on the path towards the village. After walking through the Cacao trees and down a steep hill to the creek, the image of a very frightened mother and a very sick young girl presented itself. The daughter was lying in the arms of her mother alongside the creek bed.

The mother was screaming and crying, in near hysterics. The girl had soft tears running down her face and was groaning in obvious pain. There was no question as to where the snake got her. Her lower left leg was swollen to the size of her upper quad muscle. The knee joint and ankle were hardly visible.

Moments after my arrival, Federico appeared with his eldest son. Federico was sweating bullets, but other than that he still showed no signs of panic or stress. In his hand, he carried a small lemon and a handful of bark from an unknown (to me) tree. He informed us that his father was too far way, so he sent someone else to go track him down. Meanwhile, Federico was going to make her some medicine to hold her over until her Grandfather could be found.

At this point, his daughter was weaving in and out of a conscious state. Her eyes would close, her body would go limp, and her whining would stop, then her mom would furiously shake her and tap her face until she would start groaning again.

Federico gave his daughter the mixture of lemon juice and the bark that he crushed between two rocks in the creak. The girl’s body immediately refused the medicinal mixture, by vomiting. At this point, Federico started to reveal some more emotion. He instantly turned to me questioning whether or not I was “with baby.” Their belief is that if the victim taking the medicine is in the presence of a pregnant woman, then the victim’s body will reject the medicine.
After assuring and reassuring Federico that I was not with child, he became anxious. He was convinced that his daughter was not safe in such close proximity to the hiking trail. He said that pregnant woman pass by there all the time, so he was adamant on moving her. So they hurriedly carried her off to a hidden spot in the jungle, where Federico instructed she stay until the sun went down. As they disappeared into the jungle bush, I remained on the creek bed feeling helpless.

I knew there was anti-venom for the Fer-de-lance snake in Bocas. I knew they if we took her now, she had a better chance. I explained this to them a few times, in a few different ways. But, Federico’s father, the medicine man, has a good track record and reputation for curing snake bites. They made it very clear to me that they had no intention s of taking her to the hospital. It was not a matter of money, or gas for the boat. It was solely their beliefs, customs, culture and traditions. I had to respect that. I understand my limitations as a volunteer and as an outsider. This was Federico’s daughter. He was well informed on the severity of this situation as well as his options. There was nothing else I could do. Ultimately, he made the calls. I walked back to the village alone.

I spent that whole night worrying that I was going to wake up to terrible news. Right after sunrise, one of Federico’s youngest sons came to give me an update: They brought his sister back to the house last night just after sunset. Once there, she was cornered off in the house (like they did to her when she was having her “fits”) and the medicine doctor tended to his granddaughter. He gave her a botanical mixture, and burnt the spot the snake had bitten with a hot nail. Her brother told me she made it through the night, but was not any better that morning.

I had to go into town that day, but the whole circumstance did not leave my mind. And soon to find out, the whole situation had actually followed me to town.

The Medicine man surrendered once his granddaughter started vomiting blood (which they blame on the fact that there was a woman in the room, who was not pregnant, but she was on her period). Once they got the “go ahead” for him, they rushed the girl to the hospital. I had a brief visit with the family in the emergency room, and returned later once she was admitted to the hospital, for a longer stay. I spoke with the grandfather/ medicine man while he was in the waiting room. He was pacing around barefoot, and looked extremely uncomfortable and out of place. I could feel questioning looks from other patients, doctors and nurses when I walked across the room to shake his hand. I know what they were thinking… why is this “gringa” here to visit this “Indian” family.

This was my first experience in a public hospital here in panama. It was an extremely unprofessional setting. The staff seemed rude, immature and to be honest, prejudice. There was absolute no bedside matter, or respect for the girl and her family. The old grandfather, who hardly speaks Spanish, was publicly reprimanded and humiliated for trying to cure his granddaughter. It made me sad and defensive to see the way they were treated, it must have been hard for them. Yet, I still knew that they made the right decision on bringing her there. She stayed in that hospital for 9 days, by herself. When she was finally brought back to the community she remained hammock bound for another 7 days, because her leg was still to swollen to walk.

I am glad that this story can end on a happy note that the girl is still alive, and fully recovered.

To be honest, for how much my community members walk around barefoot in the jungle, I am surprised that it took me two years to whiteness my first snake bite. But after seeing her and her family go through all that, I am so glad that it is not more of a frequent occurrence. Hopefully this “first” will also be a “last.”

~Michelle